This piece is a collaboration between Gillian and me. It is primarily my sight and voice but the clarity emerged through many hours of conversation with Gillian throughout the duration of our relationship — and I sought counsel from Gillian that this articulation and these insights were accurate from her perspective.
A simplified and more gentle version of this post made its way onto the All for Love Course page.
As the Masculine Co-Founder of Feminine Eros, I wanted to make sure the more direct, incisive and hard hitting critique of the field made its way into the public as well.
I’m going to enumerate and illuminate what makes many of the most popular paths offered to women dead ends if their desire is a highly polarized relationship, full of devotional love, fully enclosed within the pathways of Feminine Awakening.
1. Empowered Boss Babe Nuevo-Feminism
Feminine Eros teaches from a Jungian Archetypal Lens where all humans have an inner masculine and inner feminine. Empowered Boss Babe Feminism primarily teaches women how to activate and strengthen their Inner Masculine ~ not open and deepen into their Feminine Essence. If you feel into the women leading and following along this path, you will notice they embody Masculine qualities of Penetration and Assertion more than Feminine Qualities of Radiance, Magnetism, Allure and Receptiveness.
Additionally, very few of these women are in a loving, devotional relationship with an unapologetically Masculine Men — even if they are married. (We call this the Man/Money Split…they can have the Money but not the Devotional Love, even if they dangle their Trophy husband.) There is a rightness in this path, but this path must be called out for what it is: a path teaching women how to strengthen their masculine, not deepen into their Feminine.
This all said, it is amazing to see the trailblazing women paving the path of women led business online — who through their success inspire hundreds and thousands of women to follow in their footsteps to entrepreneurially align how they make money with their dharma.
2. The Performative Feminine Pleasure Queens
Pleasure programs are all the rage these days. Yet this path does not lead to the true desire of the feminine heart: devotional love. There is a rightful expression of the Pleasure Path and a distorted expression. The rightful path taps women deep into their body, sensuality and utilizes de-armoring practices to open the capacity to be able to be more deeply penetrated by men and life itself.
The distorted Pleasure Path is not in right relationship to the Masculine. It is infused with an arrogant relationship to Men and the Masculine — coded with the hidden belief, “I don’t need a Man”. Crystal wands and fancy vibrator technology can never replace the transformational alchemical crucible of Masculine and Feminine Union and can never take the Feminine into her true desire to trust a man to ravish her so deeply that she loses all sense of time, space and control.
If we look at the results of women who walk the Pleasure Path, you will see that most turn into Arrogant Princesses and Priestesses rather than Devotional Queens. A woman cannot transition from Princess to Queen until she has been egoically and devotionally ‘ruined’ by a man.
3. The Future is Female Path
There are many paths for women that preach, “the time for Men is over. The era for women to lead is now.” The leaders of these paths were frustrated with how men led in the past and seek to invert the dynamic by now placing women above men. They espouse principles like: “Men are here primarily to be in service to the Feminine”. They see themselves as Radiant Flowers and diminish the Masculine to being merely the Pot that holds them….where the more rightfully honoring frame in this analogy would see him as a Sacred Seed and the Spiritual Gardener.
Women on this path by and large choose men who are less powerful than they who are not fully in their Masculine. They covertly hold the men in their life as Boy-Toy Servants and feel entitled to this dynamic due to all the past Perpetrations of the Patriarchy. The fact is, no Feminine Heart is truly nourished or fulfilled in this dynamic. Many women come to Feminine Eros from these paths and we sometimes say it is like a secret Reform School for former devotees of One Taste and Mama Gina.
4. Explicit Submissive-Dominant Paths
There are many rightful and deeply gorgeous energetics on this path, but it too is also a dead end. Many men and women on this path get stuck in the overly codified dynamics and language of this space. You are not a ‘sub’ and he is not a ‘dom’. Submission is a natural quality of the Feminine and Dominance is an organic quality of the Masculine — but over identification with these aspects stunts growth and the flourishing of True Love. There is value in having access to the tools of this realm in one’s relational toolbox — it can significantly amplify Eros but it does not open the Heart to Devotional Love. Additionally, many of these fields are encoded with dark, parasitic qualities that are not in Service to Life and the Feminine.
5. Polarity Paths Led by Men with No Potent Feminine Counterparts
There are many male polarity teachers out in the world now gaining a lot of attention teaching both men and women — but there are often no potent feminine female teachers in those fields to embody and model the higher octaves of the Feminine Path. Men teaching women about the feminine is a problem. They can describe aspects of the topography and how men receive and perceive them when they are in different energetic states but they have no lived experience of the inner world of a woman. Because of this, they describe the inner world space of women in a way that leads to women distorting their own Feminine gnosis. Frankly, many of the women who come out of these male taught polarity fields come out in ways that we sadly, have come to call “the Frankensteined Feminine”. The dogmatic rules often feel deeply confusing to the Feminine limbic system and psyche, causing deeply rooted disarray.
6. An Absolutistic Simplicity that Strangles Reality
A sixth more general critique that applies to many teachers in this realms is that even if they accurately teach about dynamics between the Masculine and Feminine, they do so in such an absolutistic way that it strangles the true more nuanced expression of Masculine and Feminine dynamics within a human being and between them. Men should not completely suppress their Feminine aspect and in fact should nurture it. And women should not completely suppress their Masculine aspect and should in fact strengthen it.
Polarity Paths seek to support Men in developing a potent Masculine and Women in developing a potent Feminine so they can experience the magical life giving and fulfilling energetics of that electromagnetic relational circuitry — but they should not suppress authentic nature and the full gamut of human expression in the process. The couples who are Advanced Polarity Players have all 4 aspects of them (each of their inner masculine and feminine) dancing and weaving beautifully together. Their Higher Selves see with clarity the exact mix of Masculine and Feminine energies that each moment is asking of both them and their partner.
It is rightful at the beginning of this Polarity Path for men to make a concerted effort to quiet their Feminine tendencies and step fully into their Masculine and vice versa for women. This type of intentional absolutism is often needed to re-pattern the default conditioned way of being that is wanting to be changed. But it is important for students to have the intentional suppression of their non-primary energy be contextualized as something that is being done temporarily, but that will eventually come back online. We do not want to see Polarity Paths leading Men and Women to cut off fundamentally unique aspects of their soul essence — and not contextualizing and honoring the dynamic interplay of the Inner Masculine and Inner Feminine in all human beings can lead to that sordid fate. Remember, the point of the Polarity Path is the creation of a beautiful, hot, functional, co-creational love.
Gillian and I are committed to the illumination, articulation and development of Rightful Paths of the Masculine and Feminine and calling out distortions as Wayshowers in service to more directly leading men and women Home to their True Nature.
We look forward to serving the world in this way through Feminine Eros and through a future company focused on Men and the Masculine.